The other day, I was listening to the radio, and the DJ was interviewing a musician. They were talking about the importance of sad songs, and how they help people get through tough times. No one likes to listen to upbeat songs when their heart is crying out in pain.
On Sunday, one of Dad's best friends, was murdered. He was a great family friend, and my dad and him got really close when they both were single fathers, raising their kids. It was and is really hard to swallow. These things don't happen to people you know, especially not in small town Kansas, where you always feel safe. This is something that happens only in the movies, right?
When I got off of work on Monday I drove to McPherson, to see my dad. I did it more for selfish reasons, wanting to see him for my own good. After I heard what happened, it really put things in perspective to me and how important my family is to me, and I need to see him. I wanted to make sure that he knew I loved him. When I got there, I realized I needed to be there, not for myself, but for him. The man I always looked up to, who was always strong, was visibly shaken. I got out of the car and gave him the biggest hug I could, and we just cried. I held my father, not knowing what to say, just knowing that I was glad I was there, to help him through this time.
I know that if my dad didn't have God in his life, it would be so much harder to go through this moment. All I knew to do was to pray. I prayed for Mark's family, his kids and grand kids, that they would look to God through this, I prayed for my family, to be there as support, but to also make us realize how short life is, and how we tend to take each other for granted, I prayed all day, talking to God about some of the silliest things, just because I need him, needed to talk to him, needed God to hold me.
As I drove to McPherson, I began to realize how right that DJ and that musician were. I could only listen to sad songs, only those songs knew what I felt, how much it hurt. I know that this week, will define tally be a sad song week, but hopefully, next week, we will be able to rejoice in God's love, and slowly start to listen to the happy songs again.
To Mark, you were a great friend and an awesome father, you will be missed!